Cardi B’s birthday was onSunday. And there were signs leading up to the celebration – in Vegas, more on this in a minute – that the present she was about to give herself was a reconciliation with estranged husband Offset. Last week on Twitter, in response to someone dragging him for being a “bad man”, Cardi responded:

“He a dumbass not a bad man.”

That tweet and the ones that followed have since been deleted but she went on to defend him, telling people that he helped her protect her business, made sure she had solid contracts. And that she wouldn’t stand for people tearing him down because:

“If he die, go broke, you not the one that’s going to raise my kid & you not the 1 who pays for her sh-t.”

As usual, Cardi succinctly sums out how complicated it is when your partner betrays you. F-ck you, goodbye is often not an option.

But let’s go back to “he a dumbass not a bad man” because it tells you exactly how she sees him – as a bumbling fool who can’t help but be a bumbling fool. She doesn’t believe he’s smart enough to plot her pain. It’s just that he’s too stupid to avoid inflicting it on her? I guess that’s the distinction she’s making.

Not surprisingly, because it happens every time, after Cardi’s tweets defending him, Offset posted in the comment section on a Shade Room post that he was struggling because he misses “Mrs WAP”:

Which brings us to her birthday party. They flew on a private jet to Vegas. Very few people were wearing masks and there doesn’t seem to be much social distancing from the videos that have been posted and shared on social media. So I really hope no one gets a belated COVID birthday present. Anyway, the party got wild, Cardi and Offset were seen kissing, and humping too:

Offset was all over IG stories that night documenting Cardi’s birthday and his gift to her. So, clearly, he’s sending a message: I got my wife back. With a Rolls Royce, and custom seats with “Kulture” stitched on them.

Basically every time he f-cks up and has to convince her to come back to him he has to spend money. Imagine how much money he could be saving if he wasn’t f-cking up so often? A dumbass indeed.

Cardi hasn’t officially confirmed herself that she and Offset are back together (just shy of a month since she filed for divorce) but we’ve been through this so many times now, I can’t believe I actually thought this time it might stick. Or, I dunno, maybe it will? Maybe she’ll take the Rolls and the gifts and leave him anyway?

Maybe it was her birthday and she decided she needed some good dicking for her birthday but that it doesn’t have to mean anything?

Here’s the problem, at least the way I see it, from experience. There’s an expression: the quickest way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

Except with COVID and Offset up in her face all the time and celebrity insulation, where’s she going to find the “someone else”? Clearly he seems to never have any problems finding the “someone else” but Cardi’s the one with the baby all the time, and we also know that the gender double standard when it comes to sex still in play, Cardi’s probably had few legitimate opportunities outside of her DMs to actually meet anyone who might be able to satisfy the urge. So here we are. Offset the dumbass gets another chance.