Today was one of those days that, at the time, it felt like everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong. The parking gate where I park at work wouldn’t go up so it set my morning back and then a document I was working on got corrupted and some other sh-t happened before 11am and then, during our live broadcast, I had major audio issues and couldn’t hear almost the first half of the show, which is problem when you’re doing a talk show – but in the grand scheme of things, of course, these are minor irritations. As sh-tty as my day was,Scott Disick’s is much worse. His last few days have been much worse. Is it OK if I don’t feel bad for him? HE HAD HIS CHANCES. (Cele|bitchy)

Kanye West has changed his name, officially, to Ye.So from here on out, we are only supposed to refer to him as Ye. Apparently it’s legal to do this in California, like you can change your name to anything as long as there’s no suspicion of fraud so that’s all it says now on Ye’s paperwork – two letters, Ye. Unless he decides to capitalise it eventually, like to YE. Or add an apostrophe or some other punctuation which is what Jay-Z did. There was a hyphen, and then there was no hyphen, and then it was all capitals, so none of what Ye is doing is original…although I don’t think anyone wants to tell him this. Also he has a new hairstyle. (Dlisted)

I see this outfit on Salma Hayek, which is a leopard print suit with wide leg pants, and you know what I think?Knives Out. Knives Outis supposed to be a trilogy, right? Cast her in the third movie! Actually… is she already in the second movie? I’m not even sure that she isn’t anymore because that cast is so bonkers but also because it’s a natural fit! (Go Fug Yourself)

I’m just trying to figure out how this “women’s pee funnel”作品。不是,我就会使用它。我不能perform if it meant going in a pee funnel. And even if I could perform I wouldn’t be able to pee straight and it would dribble all over my thighs. But to me it just looks like a bucket. Like where is the pee being funneled? (Pajiba)

TheTed Lassobiscuits. You know them, I know you do. And I think a lot of us have wanted to know what they taste like.And now you will…because you can bake them. I will be doing this in November, for sure. (Eater)